Listen up guys. There are things I see on a daily basis that make me SMH (shake my head for you older guys). Like seriously, how do guys not know how to do things that seem so simple yet are so alpha?
I’m going to list some alpha things I believe all alpha males should know how to do. If you don’t know how to do some of these things then you better invest the time and LEARN! You don’t want to be the beta male that looks like an idiot, or do you?
#1: Know how to parallel park
Yup, I’m putting this at the top of the list. Maybe living in Los Angeles gave me the proper training to parallel park, I’m not sure. When I see guys struggling to parallel park, like they don’t know which way to turn and end up super far away from the curb, it’s a bit sad. Then you have your “date” or your girl get out of the car to tell you which way to turn and back up and what not, so sad.
Learn how to parallel park. You’ll be so much more alpha if you do.
#2: Know how to order for your date
Don’t do this all the time or you’ll seem controlling. But there are times it’s good to take charge and order for your date. Here’s how you do it.
After you two have looked over the menu, casually ask your date “What are you planning to get?” When she answers, take a mental note. You can even ask if she’s interested in an appetizer or drinks. Then when the waiter comes around asks what you two would like, you can order for her.
Boom. You’ll be so money. She’ll be telling her friends how romantic you were and ordered for her.
#3: Know how to tie a tie
There are multiple ways to tie a tie. We’re going to make a video tutorial on how to do this to help you out. The last thing you want to look like is a dork that ties a tie in a knot like you’re tying your shoes.
Worst you go around asking girls or other guys to tie your tie for you. You aren’t a little boy any more. Time to man up and learn how to tie a tie.
#4: Know how to do a bicep curl
No one likes a guy that is super scrawny (well some people do). But even if you aren’t super buff, you should know how to do a proper bicep curl.
I remember when I started helping a beta male get in shape, he stayed away from the free weights. He was intimidated by other guys at the gym and just wanted to be in the corner on the treadmill. When I started helping him lift weights, he had the worst form ever and couldn’t do any sort of lifting. It was somewhat embarrassing (but we all have to start somewhere). Do yourself a favor and learn how to lift correct. Not lift heavy, lift correctly!
#5: Know how to throw a baseball or shoot a basketball
No ones telling you to be a pro athlete but you should be confident enough that you can throw a ball or shoot a hoop if you had the opportunity. You can tell a lot about a person by how they shoot a basketball.
Don’t spend all your days trying to make baskets or anything like that but just have a good idea of how to throw a baseball or shoot a basketball. It’s all about form. Just like the bicep curl, form is everything.
#6: Know how to light a match
I don’t know when you’ll have to light a match, but at some point in your life you will. Maybe it will be when you light some candles or a cigarette or maybe starting a fire for a barbeque or bonfire.
You want to be able to take the lead and light whatever you need to light if someone ask you to use matches. Don’t be the guy that says “I don’t know to light a match, I only use lighters.”
#7: Know how to barbecue
Do you know how to grill? Can you cook a steak or a burger if someone asked you to? One of the greatest things you can do on a cool summer night is invite the guys (and girls) over for a barbeque. Be the guy that everyone says “wow this is cooked perfectly, I wish I could grill like you.”
#8: Know how to order a drink
This is primarily for the younger guys that don’t know much about drinks. Maybe you’ve ordered a few beers in your life.
Know the difference between ordering a beer in a bottle or a beer on tap. Know how to order mixed drinks (name the brand of alcohol you want). If you want a vodka tonic – say “grey goose tonic (or any type of vodka you drink).” There will be times you need to make suggestions for drinks so have some in mind that taste good and people will enjoy.
Not only do you need to know how to order a drink but you need to know how to get the bartenders attention. You do not have to wave your arms like crazy or wave money in the air. Try to make eye contact and knod or raise your hand with your index finger in the air.
#9: Know that you should tip bartenders/waitresses
When you’re young, you think skipping out on tipping is fun and cool. When you’re an emotional beta, you think being an asshole and not tipping makes you a badass.
You should know that waiters and bartenders serve you. Whether they go the extra mile or they just do their job – they get paid very little and you should be tipping. No one is going to be impressed that you were a jerk and didn’t tip. If a few dollars is really THAT much money to you, then don’t go out.
I got lucky when I was younger and was taught that I needed to tip bartenders at a bar. Not everyone knows this when they just start going to bars. And living in NYC there is a lot of tipping going on and a lot of people delivering food and serving people for practically minimum wage so I think tipping is essential.
#10: Know how to ask a girl out
If you’re alpha you’ll know how to be direct and ask a girl out. If you’re beta you’ll try to play coy and try to find a way to ask a girl out. The problem with being beta is girls are pretty smart. They know why you’re talking to them. They already know if they are going to say yes or no to your advances. So why are you trying to pretend like you don’t know what you’re doing?
If you like someone, tell them. If you want to hang out with someone, ask them.
#11: Know how to kill a bug
Are you afraid of spiders? Do you jump on your sofa or bed when you see a little bug on the wall? Well this needs to stop. I remember back in college once a girl I just started seeing called me to come over to help her kill a crazy looking bug. Whether she was too scared to kill it herself or just wanted me to come over, I don’t know. But imagine if I said “ewww a bug!! Yucky!! I’m scared of bugs!”
Man up! If nothing else, know what RAID is.
#12: Know how to shake a hand
Shaking a hand is like giving a first impression. If you have a strong masculine handshake people give you a bit more respect than if you have a soft weak handshake. The worst is when someone (or you) don’t even really grab hold of a person’s hand.
Work on your grip. Work on how you shake. Work on the eye contact and what you say when you shake hands. It’s all important.
#13: Know how to say NO
Your time is precious. Don’t say yes to everything. It’s not your job to be everything to everyone. The way to get ahead in this world is to have priorities and focus on what is important. If you’re part of the corporate world, learn how to manage expectations and delegate.
Saying “No” is not only empowering but it let’s you do things that you want to do. Even though you may think you’ll upset people by saying “No”, the truth is people respect when you set up boundaries and you’ll end up respecting yourself even more.
Why you should know how to do these things? Because it’s about being a man. It’s about being a leader. It’s about not looking like a loser.
#14: Know how to open and hold the door for people
Alpha or not, there’s something called being a gentleman. So many people just open the door for themselves and never think about other people. Maybe this has happened to you before where you were walking in somewhere and someone didn’t hold the door for you so it just closed on you. What a dick move.
People notice how you treat other people, strangers included. More importantly, you don’t want to be a dick to people you know just because you didn’t hold the door for someone.
#15: Know how to let people down gently
There comes a time in everyone’s life that you have to tell people they are not meeting (your) expectations or not fulfilling their responsibilities. You can consider it “the talk”.
You can be a total dick to someone and snap – this usually includes a lot of emotions and “you this…you that…” In the moment you might feel high and mighty but no one wins when you have this type of conversation. The better way is to give constructive criticism in a way that makes someone realize they need to do this better or differently.x
#16: Know how to defend yourself
Don’t get it twisted, fighting and defending are two different things. You never know when someone is going to try to start something trouble you, your friends or your loved ones. And I don’t think anyone ever expects an encounter with some super aggressive wannabe tough guy.
Of course you should always try to keep a level head on your shoulders and try to diffuse situations peacefully. But there may be times where things escalate and get physical. If this is the case, you have two options 1) run away or 2) defend yourself. We’re not saying you should get in fights whenever the opportunity presents itself, but you should know how to defend yourself if necessary.
Learn how to throw a proper punch or a combination of punches. Learn how to defend yourself and others.
There you have it. This is just a short list of “things” a man should know how to do. Is it set in stone that you have to be able to do all 15 of these things? Of course not. Pick and choose what you think you need to be able to do. But honestly, there are many many men that don’t know how to do many of these things and it’s just like WTF??!
We’ll start putting together guides to cover these items because just telling you, you need to be able to do these things is not enough. Telling you, then showing you how is just as important.
Until then – Be bold. Be Alpha.